I’m joined by author and podcast host Allison Pelot to talk about daily practices that allow space for reflection and connection, as well as what inspired her to write her book, Finally Thriving.
Author and podcast host Allison Pelot joins me to expand on the principles of empowered wellness. We talk about daily practices that allow space for reflection and connection, as well as what inspired her to write her book, Finally Thriving.
Allison highlights how writing has the power to bring subconscious stories to the surface and provide a different lens on life. In building the habit of journaling, we can follow our curiosity and disrupt patterning. So many of us are used to living life like we’re performing, but once we start to detach from the outcomes and embrace the flow, that’s when we truly start thriving.
Allison and I discuss the value of prioritizing time to be in your energy, or as she likes to call it, taking yourself out on a wellness date. There’s a certain abundance and vitality that comes from living authentically, and Allison shares ways to get started on that journey.
Listen to Allison’s wisdom about living in alignment and practicing genuine self-care.
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Dana Frost 00:07
Welcome to Vitally You, a podcast created to introduce you to the tools that will be your roadmap for feeling younger while growing older. I'm your host Dana frost, a wellness expert, life coach and energy medicine practitioner. Here's what you can expect conversations about vitality from the inside out with guest experts in the field of health, culture and spirituality and solo episodes along the way from me where I do deep dives into the topics of aging, heart intelligence, energy, medicine, and your innate capacity to heal. If you want to feel younger, while growing older, this is the place for you.
Dana Frost 00:52
Hi, everyone. I'm Dana Frost, your host of the Vitally you podcast. When this episode airs, I am going to be on an epic retreat in Bali, Indonesia. I am so excited to share what transpires in an episode when I return at the end of June. Like many others, I am redoing a trip I was supposed to take during the pandemic apparently, everyone is going to Bali this year. So I've heard so I will be in very good company. Now over the past year I've been a guest on different podcast and I have met incredible practitioners making a significant difference in their wellness circles. I've invited some to be a guest here to share their insights and my guest this week is one of them. Allison pillow is the host of integrate yourself podcast. She has inspired 1000s to approach their health and wellness, unconventionally, which is probably why I like her so much. She recognizes that there's no formula, but instead, we need to take a deep dive into our own individuality and connection to body emotions and soul. Allison is a dynamic fitness trainer and energy coach specializing in rapid permanent change through corrective exercise Metabolic Nutrition and energetic alignment. She helps people feel strong, confident and calm in their bodies for life changing results with practical proven energy skills, including mindfulness, reflection and deep affirmations. Now before we welcome Allison, I want to thank lightwaves X 39 stem cell patch technology for sponsoring this podcast. X 39 activates your body's own stem cells by elevating a copper peptide, life waves light therapy technology, it is the only reverse aging technology that uses your body as the energy source to do what to improve sleep, remodel the skin, improve cognition and decrease pain. X 39 goes where the body needs repairs and does the job without injections or pharmaceuticals. To learn more See the link in the show notes. Okay, please join me in welcoming Allison. Allison, welcome to the show.
Allison Pelot 03:15
Thank you, Dana. It's a pleasure to be here. Thanks for having me on.
Dana Frost 03:18
Yeah, it's so fun. I've met so many wonderful practitioners this year. guesting on podcast and having a podcast. And I was really excited when I saw your book. Finally thriving. I was like, I want to have her on my podcast. So thank you.
Allison Pelot 03:35
Yeah, you're so welcome. Yeah, we do help we hold a lot of commonalities. Between the two of us don't wait, we should do.
Dana Frost 03:42
So Alison, tell me, how did you decide to write a book, I'm really interested in sharing the contents of your book with the listeners. But what brought you to the stage in life that you wanted to write a book? I
Allison Pelot 03:54
love that question. Because it is what I'm teaching now is really helping people get into their creative process, through a wellness practice is what I call it in the book. And so I love to share that story. Because, you know, oftentimes we go through experiences in life, and then we ended up sharing that or teaching that to others that are also going through that as well. So, you know, it really started the year 2020 And it was during the time before everything started shutting down like right before and then my dad passed away in February 2020. And so I was I had the gift of being with him when he passed and it was it was just a very special moment and it it caused me to really slow down and and reflect on my life and what I was doing and what I want to be doing. And I was already heading in that direction a little bit already had read the artists way by Julia Cameron, if you've read that book, it's a classic. And it just inspired me to look at my life. I have a whole different way.
Allison Pelot 05:01
And so after my dad passed away, I, you know, I started to slow down before the world slowed down. And then everything when I got home started slowing down and the gyms were shutting down at the time, I was doing holistic personal training, performance and functional training with people, and working with physical therapists and holistic practitioners. They were referring me people to kind of take them through the next phase of healing. And that was really fun. But my schedule was so packed with people every hour of the day, five days a week, you know, even Saturdays sometimes. And so I was living a life that and teaching people things that I wasn't living myself, you know, I wasn't actually, you know, I was eating right. I was exercising, but I wasn't honoring myself. And honoring my own dreams, desires, as well as my own time, I wasn't prioritizing myself.
Allison Pelot 06:03
So the shutdown, in a way, for me was a huge gift. It didn't feel like that at first. But as I got into it, I thought, Well, okay, I have this extra time in the morning, I just read the artists way, I'm going to start just writing morning pages, you know, just start that process, see what comes out. I've wanted to write a book. And then the message came through, I started, you know, after my dad passed away, started getting these messages, you know, from the universe in my guides, and there was saying, hey, you know, you're writing, you're going to write a book now. And I'm like, Really, okay. I had no idea where it was going to start, I had the desire to write a book, but I never knew where to start. You know, it was like, I have all this information.
Allison Pelot 06:48
I've had all this experience in life, everything from holistic, healing through food and movement, chakra balancing, you know, energy healing, you name it, I've done it. I've been experiencing it, emotional healing and everything. I'm like, where do I start with all this? What? What What could I possibly right, that people want? would want to know? And then And then most importantly, what? What story do I have to tell that people would even care about? You know, I was like, Why? Why would anybody want to hear my story, you know, and so that's where I was at that time. So what I started doing is I just started taking action, I just started taking inspired action and doing that writing practice every morning. And as I began to do that, I realized how valuable it is to, to write out my own story, you know, and also just divulge information I had been holding in myself, like seeing one client at a time, you know, not really being able to share it with a bunch of people.
Allison Pelot 07:48
And it just felt so liberating, even just to get that information out, because I'd really been holding a lot in and I didn't realize it. So it started just become it was little hard at first to get going. But then it started to become a routine and more pleasant. And then every time I'd sit down to start writing, I couldn't stop. And then I had to stop because I was still seeing some clients online, and I would have to stop to go see them. So it just became like the most joyous process for me. And it opened me up to a new way of looking at myself, which was really, really spectacular, because I needed to do that I needed some kind of a pattern disruptor in my life, so that I could start seeing myself a different way and change some beliefs about myself.
Allison Pelot 08:37
So, you know, it took about six months of writing every morning, and eventually, I, you know, put together a book, it wasn't pretty, you know, when it all would after, because I would write whatever came to mind. But what I did was I hired a coach, a writing coach, and an editor who helped me, she helped format it, she also helped me weave in stories. So the coaching really helped a lot for to give me the structure because I also found out about myself that I do need, or I really enjoy people helping me with support in those areas. It's just nice to receive that so that you can just do the creative part, right? And so that's what I did and it made it so much more fun. And so even when I would like look back and you know, during the process and read my own stuff or read read a story had written I would cry because I was like wow, I haven't actually integrated this like it's still been stuck in my subconscious just hanging out in the background.
Allison Pelot 09:37
So the writing the process of writing I'd also discovered was bringing it from the the subconscious to logical like
Allison Pelot 09:46
Writing brings that subconscious stories into where you can be aware of them and understand them. And so therefore, you can begin to acknowledge them, integrate them and make peace with those stories and not hold them as to who you are so much anymore. And through that process, I learned that so through the creative process, I discovered is amazing self growth for I mean, I experienced some huge self growth in that process. And that's what I'm sharing with people now is how they can ground themselves into a healthy body and embody that health. But then even take it a step further and learn how to express themselves creatively. Open them up to that creative abundance that is so joyful, and it makes life just magical.
Dana Frost 10:34
Okay, so Alison, you said a few things that made a big impression that I want to revisit, I would like to highlight because you mentioned the artist way. And I was introduced to that back in, I think it was like 2007, when I was doing my master coach training. And I find, although I don't do morning pages every day, I've gone through seasons of doing morning pages, and I find that they are, they just make such an impact. Because they're very revealing when you allow yourself to free, you know, just free flow with your stream of consciousness. And you also mentioned pattern interrupt.
Dana Frost 11:18
And I think that, you know, a lot of the listeners are in this phase in their life, where they're looking at winding down a long stretch of focus in one area, and looking at what is it going to look like, in the future? What's the next phase? What's the third act? What's what's on my horizon. And I think that having some daily practices that allow, allow the connection to what's happening under the surface, you mentioned, the, when we invite ourselves to come forward during morning pages, a lot of things just come forward. And that's when you actually get a pattern interrupt you because you're you're looking at your life through a different lens. And I think that it's you know, it's so it seems so simple, but it's actually so powerful.
Allison Pelot 12:12
It really is. Yes. Yeah. Because I know, from my experience, I had, you know, the first phase of my life was it. For those of your listeners that aren't familiar with me, I was a gymnast for almost 20 years. And then I went right into fitness coaching. And then I went right into, you know, other areas of coaching. So I've kind of always been in this place of doing things I feel pretty good at, you know, I've never performance that Yeah, exactly, totally, totally. And that's one thing I've worked on, you know, just trying to get out of that mode, because that's, I'm pretty well trained in that. So it's one of those things where
Allison Pelot 12:54
I found in the clients I work with, and students in my class, the Finally Thriving class, they, a lot of us are just experiencing life as adult as, as we're supposed to do things we already know how to do, or if we're doing something different, we should already know how to do it should be perfect. And I realized that that is just ridiculous. And
13:18 just because we're adults, it doesn't mean that we can't have a beginner's mindset and be open to learning new things, you know, because, I mean, I'm at the, you know, I have another maybe 50 years of my life, that's a long time, I think I could learn how to play music in that stretch of time, you know, and so that's what I've been devoting a lot of my time to, as well.
Allison Pelot 13:40
But yeah, I think it's very valuable to start to reflect on your life, especially when you become middle age, because then you get the opera, you know, it's, we go in these phases, we're really developing ourselves, and then we we hit, you know, our 20s. And we're starting to really build our self identity as an adult. And then we we get, you know, if we have kids, and we're the the mom or the dad, you know, and so we're always building, we're building that self identity through all those years that we hit the mid life era. And then we're like, wow, okay, what do I really want to do? And gosh, you know, like, Am I any, I mean, of course, you're all of those things, but you're also so much more. And so the things that we we identify ourselves, as are the roles that we take, or, you know, the jobs that we take and what who we think we are, can be incredibly limiting as far as what our potential is what we what we can possibly learn or get curious about and so
Allison Pelot 14:44
What I learned was getting back to a sense of curiosity in my life, really led me to having more joy in my life, being able to really make decisions and respond to my life the way I'd like to instead of just reacting or kind of being pulled in other people's directions. I was able to get real clear on really what, you know what I like to focus on and what I'd like to create. And so, for me, it was really important because I had been doing things, supporting people as a coach or supporting people, and it's a wonderful thing to do and I loved it, and I was not supporting myself. So I learned how to do that through this process.
Dana Frost 15:30
Yeah, that's really beautiful. I think that Julia Cameron in the artists way has that. Was it Julia Cameron? Or is it Martha Beck in the joy diet, where you, you have a day where you follow your joy is that Julia is that in Julia Cameron's book, The Art is?
Allison Pelot 15:46
Yeah, I think that's where I Yeah.
Dana Frost 15:49
And I remember the first time I did that, but I can remember, I will tell you, I remember one time in college, when I was driving home. And I was by myself, one of the rare times at that stage in my life that I had, you know, time alone, because those are the years where you're with all of your friends all of the time, at least I was. And I don't even know where it where it came bubbled up. But I felt very full and abundant. And I don't know the origin, I just was in my car, I have this vivid memory, I was in my car driving home. And I just felt I felt joy, like deep joy, I felt full, I felt abundant. And I just was going on that ride home. Going with the flow, you know, obviously I was just driving. So it didn't mean activity other than driving, but allowing just these feel good feelings to bubble up. And fast forward. And I'm making this connection to having read that book and taking myself on one of those days where you just follow your joy all day, and you just do what you're where your ads you.
Dana Frost 17:02
And at that time I was in Chicago, we were we had repatriated, I was living in Chicago, I don't know what year it was, but it's really liver liberating to disrupt the pattern, I'll go back to that disrupt the pattern, and do something that you don't normally do. I'll take this also back to the performance mentality. Were actively, you know, doing something that's performative and expecting an outcome from our doing. And on the artists way dates, you're just following your joy. It's just purely where your energy is guiding you and leading you. And that comes from somewhere, doesn't come from your head. It comes from your heart. And I think that that's what, you know, this is this powerful invitation, midlife and beyond. And that starts, you know, it starts for different people at different times. But when we can really open ourselves up to what is swelling up from within from a place of joy and abundance. It's very powerful, it really switches the energy.
Allison Pelot 18:15
Absolutely, yeah. And I loved what you said about things not being about the outcome, because that is all about performance.
Allison Pelot 18:22
When you perform, you expect a certain outcome, you know, and our life can feel like a huge performance all the time. And that's very stressful, it's very depleting. And that's what I was feeling. And I was having clients come to me with the same things and, and we always try to fix those things. But really, it's about being okay with the journey, right in not worrying about the outcome, maybe letting that part go. And knowing in your heart that you're going in the right direction, and then using your intuition to to take you to where you want to go. But it's like a big, Christmas surprise, you know, you never know where it's gonna take you and it makes life more exciting.
Allison Pelot 19:03
I just feel like like our society in general, too, is is very outcome oriented. So we're kind of trained that way. And that's why people are always thinking like, what's the outcome? And of course, the outcome is important, you know, I'm not going to say it's not. But if we're making that important all the time, we're actually not being present during our lives. We're not being present during the journey and all the experiences that you could have and the connections you could have and the joy along the way. So what's the point of the outcome if you're not enjoying it, right?
Dana Frost 19:34
Yeah, and that really it also what popped into my head when you were talking, Allison is also what the additional layer of social media that we've been given if you will just become a part of us as this other layer. And so it's, it's very easy to even lean towards this idea that everything that we do has to be for You know, for a social media moment, and I think that that's also it's another outcome instead of, and there's nothing wrong with it. Like, I don't think there's anything wrong with it. But it's more probing, you know, finally thriving is dropping, I'm just gonna say this, and it's your book, but it's dropping all those constraints and really feeling that inner abundance and vitality and dropping the expectations, you know, of whatever of what the expectations most of the time, that's the expectations we have on ourselves.
Allison Pelot 20:38
Absolutely, yeah, thank you, Dana. And I, I feel that way about it, too, I and that, that was the intention behind the book, I didn't want to give a step by step, here's how you get this outcome, you know, steps one, two, and three, because I had been looking at marketing for years. And just it irritated me to only focus on the outcome or, although we have to, you know, in marketing, that's understandable how you why you would do that. But to me, I was like, Well, what about the what about the experience, like, what about being present for the now you know, and so, when I wrote the book, I wanted to give people some, you know, experience of the book of that will give them ownership of their own experience, basically, of the book, it has nothing to do so much with me, I'd like to plant seeds for people so that they can have these insights within because I don't know what they're gonna get from it.
Allison Pelot 21:30
So I started to look into all ways of doing that through Holistic Health, through my voice, through movement, expression, all of these different ways of being able to express really in feel my own essence. And that may be out there for some people, but it's really about your own energy. It's like, what does your energy feel like, and I wanted to give people a chance to reflect on their own lives so they could start feeling really what they feel like, because we were so intertwined with all everybody else's energy during the day. And I was finding that people were having a hard time, discerning between really what they were wanting to focus on and what other people were pulling them into, and, and all of these distractions in their lives, and in mental chatter, especially with social media, now, we have a lot of that.
Allison Pelot 21:30
And I've been reading Rick Rubin's book lately, we talked, we're talking about all these other books, but I want to talk about mine too. But I also, there's so many also great creative books out there. And he was saying that expressing oneself in the world and creativity are one in the same. And it might not be possible to know who you are without somehow expressing it. And that was a quote from Rick Rubin. And that's the conclusion I made to because, you know, I was like, how my struggle was like, How do I know myself? How can I fight? You know, how can I actually know myself, like I really had this desire to do that.
Allison Pelot 22:59
And if you're, you know, you don't have to be a DD now, you're everybody is pretty much having those characteristics, because our brains are being trained that way. So with that, I wanted to give everybody bite sized chapters that were easy and enjoyable to read, so that we could start getting our right brain balanced with our left brain and start to there's also writing practices in there to bring those two sides of the brain together, like the bringing out parts of the subconscious that could be causing a lot of anxiety and stress in your life, but you're just not aware of it. And so I wanted to help people through that process, through aligning the mind learning how to connect and ground into your body, and then learning how to listen to your spirit your your inner knowing your intuition, because they're all a part of the health, the wellness process, you know, it's not just about food and movement, it doesn't just stop there.
Allison Pelot 23:56
You are also moving emotions through your there's a lot of people right now talking about which evident industry long enough I, I don't remember a whole bunch of people talking about emotional wellness the way they're talking about now. Now, more people with somatic healing, coming out there talking more about how to move emotions through the body, right. And we can do that. Through just through writing. There's many different ways to do it through voice through dance, there's just but it's takes that awareness, it's really about the awareness and acknowledging what is is what's most important. So, you know, and it takes courage for most people to go there. It can be simple, but it's just it's taking that next step to become aware of what is nagging yet, you know, and what what is behind the scenes.
Dana Frost 24:46
You mentioned, briefly, this idea that we get intermingled with people we're around your tribe becomes your vibe. I think that there's so much truth in that unless we have conscious awareness and we Make decisions independent of the people around us. But we have to bring a lot of consciousness to that. And what are like, what would you say to someone who is in this place? And they're like, Okay, yeah, this makes sense to me. Where do I start?
Allison Pelot 25:19
Yes. So I designed the book to give people a little bit of a structure to on where to start. And how I start people is aligning the mind in someone asked me, Well, why wouldn't you just start with the body? And why are you starting with the mind? And I said, because I've trained hundreds of people over the years. And the biggest challenge I've had in the gym with people is them not being able to be in their bodies when they're working out. And that all has to do with a mind right. So our mind is somewhere else when our bodies doing something a lot of times and so if we can begin to train the mind to focus in the now more often, then we're going to be able to do that really easily throughout our lives, you know, we're going to or easier. So I found that learning your your mind is default mode.
Allison Pelot 26:14
First is the first step. So what that means is that you reflect on what you think about 90% of the time, does your mind go to the negative? Are you saying can't, won't? Shouldn't? Couldn't? Are you putting all these blocks in into things you really want to be doing? But you're not you're blocking yourself from it? Or are you saying, wow, you know, I can do this, I am this, I'm doing it, you know, I am excited about this. And I get to do this, those are things that I feel even as I say them on this show, I feel my heart opening, you know, and you can try this at home, you can you can say those words and feel in your body, like what does that feel like and then say the other words and feel how that feels like and then you can easily connect with how important words are that we think and that we say, because what we're doing is we're creating a vision board of scents to our life like, you don't have to put it on an on poster board, you can just think it and it will get created.
Dana Frost 27:18
Oh, that is so powerful, Allison and everything that you just said there's so much power behind it. Because even though our mind is so powerful, even the heart vibrationally, the heart is more powerful than the mind. And the heart is continually sending messages to the brain. And then the brain is releasing different chemicals. But our the way that we have an emotional experience, that then creates the heart rate variability, I'm always talking about Heart Math, it's our mind, it's our beliefs is what we're thinking. And so first, really, we do have to set the mind straight. It's a powerful first step, because there's the ripple effect of everything else. I remember I had I think it was Carol Corvino. I had her on my podcast, and she was talking about the power of when you're strengthening a muscle. You've got to get your mindset right there on that muscle.
Dana Frost 28:20
And you can actually do less physical exercise if your mind is right there strengthening that muscle. Yes. So it's really essential to get the mindset in the process.
Allison Pelot 28:33
Absolutely, yeah, we limit ourselves greatly with our minds. And so we start there. And yeah, it with the self beliefs, too. I mean, also, you know, our self beliefs live in the mind, right? I mean, like, and
Allison Pelot 28:47
The thing that I find that is so valuable to, as I've been working with people through this is learning how to ask the right questions. So if it does come up, like you're saying, I can't I shouldn't I want well ask yourself why you're saying that, you know, just a simple question, why? And that opens it up, right? It just opens it up to other possibilities. Okay, just just by setting that, then you're saying, wait a minute, there's something that doesn't feel right here. And let's reflect on this, you know?
Allison Pelot 29:20
and then, you know, ask and you shall receive is the saying and, and remember, Abraham Hicks had a book, I think with that title, and it's true, but it's something we forget, we forget to ask questions. We forget to ask questions about our life about how things could unfold about why we're feeling a certain way, you know, what could this be about, you know, just little things like that. It doesn't have to be a fix it project but you could you can just ask the question and then put it out there and then have the presence to to see what comes you know, and it also relaxes the nervous system because you're not always thinking about it.
Dana Frost 30:01
Yeah, it comes back to the curiosity that you mentioned at the beginning of our conversation. When we bring curiosity and no, I would say no judgment just isn't allowed. That's off the table. And you just get to be curious about what's happening.
Allison Pelot 30:18
Absolutely, yeah. All the great, all the great mystics, sages, ascended masters. I mean, they talk about, you know, with meditation, just letting these thoughts just kind of float on by and that's eventually what you can start to do. And what that just means is, it just means you're not attached to them. You're just observing them. And you're saying, Oh, that's interesting. And you'll get to that point, eventually. But it does take a consistent practice. You know, that's why I coined the term wellness date, because I was so inspired with Julia Cameron's work, I said, Well, we can go on wellness dates to let you know, she talks about the artists date. But the wellness data is similar in a way that you're prioritizing time with yourself. But it's about you spending that precious time and being present for yourself.
Allison Pelot 31:07
Because what I'm learning even more so recently, is that everything wants to know that it exists, that includes everything, right? So if you think of it like that, you're like, wow, okay, suppressing something, ignoring something is actually not acknowledging that it exists. So if you
Allison Pelot 31:24
If you practice presence with yourself, then you begin to become the observer more in your life. And you can see things come through and allow them to pass through without attachment. That is what leads to inner peace. And that's what leads to pure presence and responding to your life instead of reacting to it or being stressed out all the time pulled in, you know, you can live a more joyful, freeing like a liberating life that way, if you're if you're practicing that.
Allison Pelot 31:52
But many people don't really, I found, and I was one of those people as well, as I explained earlier in the show, I guess, they do not devote that time, even 10 minutes for themselves, even just to lay on the floor and do nothing, you know, every day, but the wellness date can be a creative endeavor, you can just create whatever you want, like I posted today, my ukulele practice, that's something I just go to, when I just don't want to think about anything. So I just want to play, you know, and just give myself that time to be with my own energy. You know,
Dana Frost 32:27
I think that's so beautiful. And for the listeners, like what is it that you what your ukulele, what do you go to, for me, it's, I mean, in Miami, it tends to be getting on my bike. At the end of the day, it's also just going to the kitchen and cooking and following my joy in terms of what do I want to create in the kitchen and just following that and committing myself to it and being present with it. But it's, it is important to have to have something that you can go to where your system relaxes under the activity of it. And the activity of it could be legs up the wall, or like you said, lying on the ground, it doesn't have to be and it doesn't have to be something where you're actually in movement, but to find something where you can lose track of time. And you feel yourself being restored in the midst of it.
Allison Pelot 33:22
Yeah, absolutely. You're just learning how to be we already know how to do, but we don't know how to do through being through experiencing ourselves, you know, we're trying to be or do what we think people want us to do. Right? Many oftentimes, and, and show up that way. But we've never really learned to practice showing up as ourselves. What does that feel like? What does it look like? What could it be like it can be many different things. So I give my students a lot of different tools for that they get to choose what they'd like to put together in their daily practice but anything from breathwork to meditation to guided meditation to vocal toning to an art piece, you know, I had a student in the in the class started sewing because he really love to sew when he wanted to get back to you and that was his thing.
Allison Pelot 34:08
And then another person, you know, started riding her bike and then another person you know, she's she started getting outside more and just walking in nature. So it's these can be different things that we just they're just it's just taking you on a date. That's the whole idea right? Because we don't give ourselves enough time a lot of times to to get to know ourselves but then we get into a relationship and we want this person to know is like how come you don't know me? It's because you don't know yourself. Right? That's that's what it comes down to. So I started thinking, well, I if I'm going to take full responsibility. I got to know that first. So in the best way possible.
Dana Frost 34:48
Yeah. When I had my health Well, actually it was way before my health crisis. But after we adopted and we were living in Brazil and I had five children and I we were in the adaptation process. My coach at the time had me go on what she called 24 hours. And I would go check myself into a hotel near my home for 24 hours to separate myself from that role from my roles and responsibilities to be by myself, and just to be with myself. And it's really so very powerful to see yourself like, how am I showing up? Who, who is showing up? And to see yourself separated from your roles and responsibility?
Allison Pelot 35:32
Yeah, who are you without that because, you know, it could be gone one day, as a lot of people experienced, you know, and I want to touch upon also, what this has a lot to do with to is, you know, as people like you and I who are in service of other people, we're givers, like if you're a coach, or if you know, you're in that industry, or any of other industries that are like that, you're giving all the time. And so what I learned was, I did not know how to receive and many people I worked with did not how to know how to receive. And that's a big part of it, we were taught that receiving is is bad, but it's actually a big part of the the giving in. So you know, in order to give unconditionally, you have to know how to receive unconditionally. So that's part of the practice to like you're saying Danites, with learning how to be with yourself and be without what you do, like, that's an act of receiving right there. Right?
Dana Frost 36:32
Absolutely. It is. Yes, Alison. Well, thank you so much for sharing these insights are really, they seem so simple, but the challenge is in the practicing,
Allison Pelot 36:46
I find people don't do it. That's the thing. Like, yes, they are very simple. And that's but people aren't doing that, you know, they're not practicing it. So that's what I'm helping people with. And it's really fun. And it's very profound, actually, this to the most I've found the most simple things are the most profound things in life. And yeah, it's pretty amazing.
Dana Frost 37:07
So Alison, what does feeling younger while growing older mean to you? Yeah, so
Allison Pelot 37:14
I have definitely learned how to take care of my body over the years. So it's, you know, learning how to care for yourself, right, that's a big step. And knowing, you know, of course, the basics, that the food, moving, your body, exercising, those are all things that are going to keep you healthy. I mean, we know, weightlifting, to lightweight lifting is a great way to stay healthy and have healthy hormones, and eating the right foods to that are very clean and organic. But also beyond that, like we've been talking about is learning how to listen to your intuition, and learning how to blend those or balance the masculine and feminine within you, you know, like, starting to harmonize the two. That's what I've found in myself if I was to add a balance, and I used to also work with people who, especially women who are too much in the like the doing doing doing going, going, going striving, hustling kind of thing, they would really deplete and burn themselves out pretty quickly, you know.
Allison Pelot 38:23
And that's also because they weren't giving back to themselves like we were just talking about. So the receipt, they weren't receiving the love the nourishment, and nurturing themselves to keep that lifeforce that vital life force energy going in the body, and in the spirit, you know. So I find as we get older, I can only speak from a woman's point of view right now. But I found that I feel younger as I start to get more curious about my life and start to get more creative, like really step into more creativity and creative projects and play more because I felt like when I was when I find other people that I work with are feeling that too, it just makes life much more exciting as you get older. Because what it does is it it opens up that next phase of your life you're not like, you know, if you think about it, we were we were developing a lot through those years.
Allison Pelot 39:21
And as we get older than we were we were like okay, we know enough now. We don't need to it's not that we don't ever want to know more. It's just that we are we are we know where enough and then now we can do what our heart's desire, you know, we can go forward with that. So some people don't answer the call and they, you know, suppress that part of themselves and that's where they get depleted. You know, you have issues of sometimes fibromyalgia or sometimes even breast cancer these things surface because this dis ease in our bodies, you know, is manifest as disease is certain disease. So, Louise Hays books are just amazing for that, you know, just to see how that correlates with the body. I love her stuff.
Dana Frost 40:07
For you. I've got to tell you, I was thinking one thing I was gonna say, and then you said her name, but her breakout book was published in her late 50s.
Allison Pelot 40:16
I saw that on your on your feed the end, I loved it. I was like, Oh, I'm so glad you brought that up. Because I was meant to bring that up, too. Yeah, I saw that. I was like, I had no idea. She was 55 when she did that she
Dana Frost 40:28
was in her 60s When she started Hay House out of her home. And I think it's because we relax.
Allison Pelot 40:37
Exactly. The energy of relaxation. Yeah,
Dana Frost 40:42
it doesn't mean that you're actually not active, but you're relaxed in your activity, and it makes you far more makes you more productive. Yeah, you're not going for the productivity, you're actually going for the creativity.
Allison Pelot 40:56
Exactly. It's really at our speak again, for as a woman, it's the feminine aspect, if you start to step into the beauty, the slowness, the relaxation within your life, the the flow, right? The flow of your life. Men is for men too, of course, it's just really, then you can be more present with your life, and you can enjoy it. And that really makes you younger, that keeps you younger, you know, because it's something that what I'm trying to say is like that creative aspect, that creative spark, it makes life more, there's more potential there, like you said, with Louise Hay story. I mean, who would have known she created her publishing company at the age of 55. Like, we all think we have to have it all done and got it got it right when we're younger, but actually, no, that's those are developmental stages. That's where you're trying different things. And then, you know, you can keep doing things until you want it doesn't end at a certain point, right. But we have to it's about somewhat about purpose, but it's also really about, I think, on a higher level about joy, and bliss. And experiencing that, you know, being really just happy and grateful for for where you are and what you're doing. And then and then getting curious about what could be next, you know, that's a super fun energy to be in.
Dana Frost 42:23
Mm hmm. I love that. So we are at the end of our time together, Allison, but it's been really wonderful to have this conversation with you and to lean in to the softer side of the next phase in life. And so thank you, thank you. I'm really, really appreciate your insights.
Allison Pelot 42:42
Oh, you're so welcome. Thank you, Dana for having me on it. This has been a pleasure and a delight.
Dana Frost 42:47
Thank you. Thank you everyone for joining me on the Vitally You podcast. Don't forget to check out Allison's book Finally Thriving and her podcast Integrate Yourself. If you enjoy this podcast please leave a review subscribe, download and share it with a friend and you know that will make my heart sing and be so happy. Until next week. I am streaming love from my heart to yours.