Listen in to hear my process for working through depleting emotions and healing from the inside out.
There's pressure to start a new year feeling invigorated and inspired but that's not the experience for everyone.
I started 2023 feeling burdened with a resistant stye, cough, and cold along with feelings of melancholy.
Instead of stewing in these depleting emotions, I chose to be curious about the narrative I was telling myself about my health and depleted emotional state. I took this curiosity to my daily quiet time with an open heart and ears. The energy immediately shifted when I sat down in my daily sacred space. A sense of clarity rushed over me.
Your system will learn to trust you when you embrace the full landscape of your emotional experience. Everyday and every moment is a fresh start. It's okay if these first few weeks of January haven’t met expectations. Feeling the wide range of emotions make us human and relatable.
Listen in to hear more about my process for working through depleting emotions and healing from the inside out.
Don’t forget, if you would like me to do an entire solo episode on the idea of a quiet time, please let me know in my DMs or email!
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Dana Frost 00:07
Welcome to Vitally You, a podcast created to introduce you to the tools that will be your roadmap for feeling younger while growing older. I'm your host, Dana Frost, a wellness expert, life coach and energy medicine practitioner. Here's what you can expect: conversations about vitality from the inside out with guest experts in the field of health, culture, and spirituality, and solo episodes along the way from me where I do deep dives into the topics of aging, heart intelligence, energy, medicine, and your innate capacity to heal. If you want to feel younger, while growing older, this is the place for you.
Dana Frost 00:52
Hi, everyone. This is Dana frost, your host of vitally you podcast. I'm coming to you solo this week. I'm curious what's coming up for you with the beginning of a new year. Today's episode is about managing depleting emotions. Okay, I know that's a real upper for the beginning of a new year. But really, let's talk about that. Because there's so much pressure to have a curated life. How about if we just stay present? When life gets tough? Can we embrace emotions that are depleting without wishing them away? How about mining, depleting emotions for the why underneath them, and staying present with those feelings without judging them.
Dana Frost 01:37
Because this is what I've learned whatever comes up, whatever emotions bubbled to the surface, they're really coming from the center of your heart and your soul, they want to be seen. And instead, what we tend to do is sidestep them, we ignore them, we complain about them, we talk about them to our friends. And we've been trained really to stuff them. So let me share why I'm talking about this because it's actually very personal. I ended 2022 and started 2023. With a painful, horrible spy in my eye, a bad cough, and a cold that actually spread to my entire family. That's not bad. In and of itself, we all get colds. But I had felt so strong all year, and I hadn't even entertained the thought of not being well for the holidays. But that was really just part of what was going on. For me, when I really looked into it. It went all the way back to the beginning of 2020 to 2022 started with a discord between my husband and myself. And there were these deep feelings of melancholy and sadness. And I also got COVID. At the same time, all of that was happening last January.
Dana Frost 02:54
And this time last year, I just was waiting in these very deep depleting emotional waters. And I was hoping I was like, it's gonna be different this year, I was hoping to enter 2023 feeling strong and invigorated. And instead, I was literally felt like I was hacking up a lung. And to top it off, I started feeling melancholy again. And to be honest, I just I didn't want to be there. I didn't Why didn't want to have another January where I was just in this melancholy mood. And here I was, and it was really just undeniable. So I'm just curious, what do you do when you have dark, moody feelings? We all have them. So I did what I encourage my clients to do. And I entered self care mode. So my husband and I came back from San Francisco we had, I don't know we had I think a definitely a full day. And a lot of the next day before my daughter and her husband and our grandson arrived. And I just I started doing all the things that I know to do. I did a castor oil pack, legs up the wall, the coyote session, I really healthy food. My husband and I walked I got out into the water on the beach. I read I read a book. And I just became really curious.
Dana Frost 04:16
This is really the key component, I became really curious about the feelings that were surfacing. I had created some space, I had a little bit of time in between time where I could just look at what was coming up and why it was coming up. And I sought guidance from my wise inner teacher and from spirit and from my guides. And before I go any further, I'm really curious now, I did this in the context of my quiet time many of you know that I have this ritual. And so I'm curious, do you have a daily ritual a quiet time? And I love the term quiet time because it feels so pertinent today. Life is so noisy and we just are confront Did with unrelenting distractions from our phones. So, I want you to know that the most vital life practice is my daily quiet time. I've been at it my entire adult life. It started when I was in high school. And I just cannot live without it. It's like oxygen. It's my water. And it's my daily bread. I've talked about it a lot in the past. And I'm kind of curious, would you like me to do an entire solo episode on the idea of a quiet time? Please let me know I, my clients know about this.
Dana Frost 05:35
People who have worked with me in the past know about it. But if this is something you're interested in, please let me know. Just send me an email. Okay. Let's get back to this quiet time I dedicated to these feelings I was having about being sick. And the melancholy that was coming up for me. Well, I want you to know something, the energies started shifting as soon as I softened. I softened. You see, I allowed myself some time, I stopped resisting reality. And I sat down in that sacred ceremony, that is my quiet time with myself and my guides. And I will tell you just even as I can put myself back to this, I was on my balcony. It was early in the morning. And I just the melancholy emotions, suddenly, they just didn't feel so strong. My thoughts about not feeling 100% started to melt. And I started to receive these insights about my feelings and how to proceed and how to move through them and what the route was. This is the clarity that comes forward, when we have a daily ritual and bring our curiosity, our curiosity and open mind and our heart. There's so much love and support available to us if we take the time to be present with it.
Dana Frost 06:59
And you may be wondering, well, what do you do in your quiet time? What did you do in this quiet time? On that particular day, I played my singing bowl. I wish now that we're on video, I could show you but I have this beautiful, this beautiful singing bowl. So I spent some time with the singing bowl. I prayed. I journaled and I pulled cards for my totem deck. And I'll I'll link that in the show notes. And I set in silence and listen with an open heart. And I just started receiving I just I received the sunshine on my skin, I received the air around me, I received just insight that came from my wise inner teacher and that that comes in the form of just words and information downloads. And so that really just cleared this constriction and how I was feeling I no longer saw it as a barrier or something bad in my life. I saw it as Wow, that's that's actually during that time is how I linked it back to last year, and how I wanted to come into this year and how it was really all connected.
Dana Frost 08:12
And so I want to talk about what happens when we have depleting emotions because it's a part of the human they are a part of the human experience. So what are depleting emotions, things like anxiety, depression, melancholy, moodiness, grief, anger. So what happens is first, there is constriction in the system, the muscles, your muscles are going to tighten. And most of the time we're not really aware of this tightening of the muscles, it's really automatic. But the emotions, what gets our attention, what got my attention, want, I felt horrible. And when I really paid attention when I was feeling melancholy that emotions grab our attention, and the body just shows up with tension in the muscles, that's going to happen actually, that tension as soon as we have a depleting thought, the muscles begin to tense. So pay attention to the subtleties in your mind body system because it's actually this continual feedback loop. And the brain.
Dana Frost 09:21
The brain responds because it starts you the brain, you have the image or you have the thought, you get constriction, you have the emotion and the brain begins releasing a cascade of hormones that pulse through your body. And these chemicals, they're either going to deplete your body of its reserves or they're gonna fuel you. These depleting emotions that I mentioned anxiety, depression, grief, they deplete the body and emotions like the feeling emotions, courage, compassion, love, joy. They fuel the body. So you can see that's the mind body connection. It's so beautiful. What we have have in our human, where we have our soul that comes with us into this life time. We have this human body that's programmed with our DNA, we have a body that actually has an immune system and a neurological system and digestive system we have everything we need. Our body actually is the technology that we need. Okay. So when you have a depleting emotion, what I want you to do is try to soften where you feel the constriction. And I find this is most easily access to the breath. You know, I talk a lot about the breath. So to start by breathing, and your breathing anyway, that's automatic, that bring conscious awareness to your breath.
Dana Frost 10:50
And follow that with curiosity. So you just soften. You breathe, and direct your breath to go to where you feel constriction and follow a curiosity. What am I feeling? Why am I feeling this? What's the route? How am I supposed to go forward? What can I do? What do I need in this moment? Based on these feelings that I'm having? What? What is this? What do these feelings remind me of from my past, because any feeling state, it's going to have a resonance from the other times in your life when you felt that those feelings Ah, you can see how that happened in January with melancholy. So most of the time, you won't have this insight right there. You know, like, I didn't have an insight when I was softening on the beach. And just reading my book that 24 hours when I was just like trying to take care of myself, I didn't have instant insight, but I could feel things begin to soften. But this is why daily ritual is vitally important. Because me in my situation, my system, it knows I'm going to have a daily ritual.
Dana Frost 11:57
And it knows that time is really set apart, and I'll bring to the table or bring to that sacred space, what's going on. So my system, trust me, it trust me that I'm going to do the work and take care of it. That's what you build in. When you have a daily quiet time and a ritual, you can just relax a little bit more when you know, you're going to have that daily ritual, and the breath. So this is why let's go back to the breath. This is why I love Heart Math, Heart Math, if you're a regular listener, you've heard me talk about Heart Math, Heart Math, it's a Research Institute in California. And they have given us breathing techniques that neutralize depleting emotions in the moment, and bring harmony to the nervous system. Which by the way, what's releasing those chemicals, your nervous system, so it harmonizes your breath through your your breath through your modulating that heart rate variability, and then working with the your neurological system to calm those depleting emotions down or to bring forward fueling emotions.
Dana Frost 13:05
The Heart Math techniques, what they do, they tap into the energy and intelligence of the heart, instead of the fear driven amygdala, that really the amygdala, it's your fight and flight. And so with Heart Math, on the go breathing techniques, you can tap into the intelligence of your heart. And you don't have to stuff those emotions. You can just breathe through them, they're still going to be there. I was still feeling melancholy, but I was using just heart focus breathing with the feeling of inner ease to move through it. Okay, so let's go back to the beginning of the year, there are so many expectations, obviously, I was feeling the expectations for the beginning of a new year. And I'm here I just want to tell you that every day is a new day. You don't need a new year to have a new start. You just don't I don't care who you are, how biohack you are how optimized how strong you feel. Being human means that we experience everything that life has to offer. We have seasons that feel like summer for me that's like I flourish in summer.
Dana Frost 14:15
We have seasons that feel like we are very deep under the weight of a dark, cold winter's day. And we need to feel the wide range of emotions that make us human. We can't biohack ourselves from that which makes us human and that is one of the things that make us makes us human is the suffering of mankind. We want to be present because what happens to one happens to the whole we're all interconnected. And I feel that in the wellness industry. And even in the longevity industry. There's this idea that we can optimize ourselves to the point of not are having difficult times, not feeling depleted emotions. And I just want you to know that's just not true. We will hurt and we will be hurt. We will love so much that we find ourselves as the recipient of loss, tragedy and even betrayal. Even Jesus, and every master that has walked the earth walk this planet, experienced human suffering. Our suffering makes us believe the bowl. Healed pain points are the foundation for compassion, and care.
Dana Frost 15:38
And as we approach this new year, there are a lot of unknowns, I can tell you, I've heard from more people about pain and suffering and anxiety and concern than I've ever heard in a compacted period of time. People are feeling insecure right now. If you haven't buttoned down your own hatches, and by that I mean daily ritual, quiet time to keep it and care of yourself. A self care plan that you know you are going to be committed to it is your lifestyle. Now is the time we live in serious times, and serious times demand we take dominion over our lives in a serious way. There's a lot of seriousness in what I just said. But this is where we are. And finally your health it is your most important commodity right now. I really believe this. Stay out of hospitals if you can get your home. And when I say your home, I mean this earth suit in order and start with your gut health and your mindset. Now I did a solo episode where I really give you the framework for health for through the functional lens and I'll reference that episode in the show notes. If you feel like you need regular support, I still have room for one more coaching client and 2023 I'm only taking five I made it super affordable.
Dana Frost 17:19
You get one coaching one full coaching session with me a month you get check ins because we need check in so you get you know little text check ins or you get phone call 15 minute phone call check ins, you get a guided meditation, you get a focus for the month you get a full functional nutrition, health history and matrix and a strategy. It's really an incredible offer. It's only $300 a month so just enough said about that but I want to thank you for joining me I'm so happy that you're here.
Dana Frost 17:53
Thank you I've had some of you reach out to me and just share how much this has meaning to you and and I really appreciate that. I want to go to a the most recent Apple review is from Linda M R G and she says just listened to connecting with our inner child and healing it. Oh my goodness, so powerful. If you are enjoying this podcast, please hit subscribe download, leave a review, you know that makes my heart sing. Share the episodes with friends. It makes me so happy. It boosts the podcast but for more listeners it really is so helpful. So as always, I am streaming love from my heart to yours